


Nobody Tosses A Dwarf

by likethenight



Series: Writers' Month 2020 [22]
Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Best Friends, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Gen, Glittering Caves, Humor, Nobody Tosses A Dwarf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:01:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26106889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likethenight/pseuds/likethenight
Summary: While exploring the Glittering Caves, Legolas and Gimli come across a place where the path has fallen away. Legolas can make the jump, but Gimli...can't quite.Ficlet written for Writers' Month 2020 day 25, prompt "drop"
Relationships: Gimli (Son of Glóin) & Legolas Greenleaf
Series: Writers' Month 2020 [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1867720
Comments: 10
Kudos: 13
Collections: Writer's Month 2020





	Nobody Tosses A Dwarf

**Author's Note:**

  * For [palavapeite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/palavapeite/gifts).



> I had no idea what to write for today's prompt, but the ever-invaluable [palavapeite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/palavapeite) suggested "dropping a person as an unwanted outcome of, say, tossing a Dwarf", and lo and behold, this occurred. I am grateful beyond words. <3333

After Éomer and Lothíriel’s wedding, Gimli finally manages to persuade me to visit the Glittering Caves with him. Since we are in Rohan already, it is not too far to ride, and although it gives me a strange feeling when we approach Helm’s Deep, like a shudder over my skin to see it so empty, when the last time I saw it the bodies of Men and Elves and Uruk-Hai were piled high against its walls, I put it aside. That time is over, and the Shadow has passed. 

We ride side-by-side up the long ramp that leads to the main gate; Éomer has given us the keys so that we may access the cave directly from the fortress, rather than taking any of the more roundabout ways that are hidden in the mountain passes behind. As we reach the gatehouse I glance aside to the postern gate, from where Gimli has told me he and Aragorn mounted their attack on the Uruk-Hai trying to storm the gate during the battle. The distance between the postern steps and the ramp seems rather far, and I give my friend a rather quizzical glance.

“Did you not say that you and Aragorn leapt from the postern gate to the ramp?” I ask him, and Gimli harrumphs. 

“Of course I did,” he says gruffly, “and of course we did. What of it?”

“I am only thinking that it seems like quite a long distance,” I say mildly, and Gimli huffs in the way he has that tells me he is covering something up.

“And I leapt it,” he says. “Very good motivation, having a ramp full of Uruk-Hai charging your friends, y’know, laddie.”

I consider the gap again, and I make a conciliatory sort of a noise, but secretly I am resolving to ask Aragorn about it, the next time we meet.

“Well, of course, nobody tosses a Dwarf,” I murmur, amusement tugging at the corners of my mouth, and Gimli harrumphs again. 

“Of course they don’t. We are a very dignified people. It’s not just you pointy-ears who know how to comport yourselves.”

I have to laugh at that. “No indeed, you are quite right,” I tell him, and I leap lightly from my horse to unlock the gate into the fortress, and then lock it behind us when we are both safely through.

The way into the caves is one that will be engraved upon my memory for all time; the terrible, tense atmosphere as we ushered the women and the children in to safety, and prepared the men and the boys to fight. The caves were crowded, then, and I remember Éowyn telling me of the awful quiet in there, everyone too frightened to make much noise beyond the occasional sob or whimper, even the littlest children. But now, all is completely silent, except for the echoing sound of our footsteps, and Gimli’s gasp of wonder as we make our way from the entrance into the first bejewelled cavern. Not for nothing are these called the Glittering Caves, and I have to admit that the effect is quite spectacular; more so even than the interior of the Lonely Mountain, or the halls of my father in the Woodland Realm. Although I will never admit that to him, for I do not wish us to become estranged again.

We make our slow way further into the caverns, Gimli occasionally exclaiming at their splendour, until we come to a place where the path has fallen away. It is not wide, or at least, I would be able to leap across it with no effort at all, but I think it is further than Gimli can jump; and the drop is not great, perhaps only a few feet, but there is no way around it. A smile tugs at my mouth again, for now I see an opportunity to have some fun. 

I take the leap, springing easily from one side of the gap to the other, and turn to face Gimli, smiling merrily. 

“Are you not going to join me?” I ask him, as he stands on the edge of the drop and eyes the gap, and the distance both between him and the other side, and between him and the bottom of the little chasm. 

“In a minute, laddie, in a minute,” he grumbles, stepping back a little, and I fold my arms to wait for him; is he going to try it with a run-up? But he clearly thinks better of it, and after a few more moments, I decide to take matters into my own hands. I leap back across the gap, and bite back a smile. 

“Might I offer you some assistance?” I ask him lightly, and he mutters under his breath. 

“I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m just thinking.”

“Well, when you have finished thinking, just let me know,” I tell him, and I sit down on a smooth rock, waiting for him to accept the inevitable. 

After a very long few minutes, Gimli scuffs one foot against the ground in a sort of kicking motion. “All right, then, all right, perhaps I may need some assistance in crossing this gap. Perhaps. But no tossing!”

I jump to my feet, smothering the laugh that wants to escape me. “My dear friend,” I tell him, catching him around the waist, “I am not sure how else we will get you to the other side.” And I go to throw him carefully across the gap - more carefully, indeed, than I am sure Aragorn had the time to do, either of the other times this has happened - but just as I do so he wriggles indignantly, and I lose my grip on him and to my horror he slips from my grasp and half-slides, half-falls into the little chasm.

“You dropped me!” he roars, “you dropped me!” and I feel a nervous, almost hysterical laugh trying to escape me. I bite it down firmly - not for nothing have I had centuries of practice at hiding what I am feeling - and I leap to the other side again and drop to my knees, leaning over the edge to grasp his hands and pull him back up. It is not a dignified rescue by any means, but soon he is lying panting on the rock and cursing me in his own tongue, and now I cannot help but give in to the laughter that is bubbling up inside me. 

“It’s all very well for you!” Gimli grouses. “With your long legs and your light feet and your springs for knees! This is _precisely why nobody tosses a Dwarf!_ “

“Well, I can see that now,” I tell him, in between peals of laughter, “if none of you can hold still while being thrown!”

He lapses back into his own language at that, harrumphing and grumbling curses, and even after we have continued on our way he does not deign to speak to me again for at least two hours. 

But when he does, he sounds at least a little bit contrite, or as much as he is capable of. “Don’t tell Aragorn?” he says in a rather uncharacteristically small voice, and I lay a hand on his shoulder with a smile. 

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” I tell him. For his friendship is more valuable to me than a funny tale, and I am quite happy to keep this little episode between us, just as I am happy to pretend that I believe that he leapt between the postern gate and the ramp during the battle for Helm’s Deep. Sometimes the truth is not as important as one’s relationship with one’s very best friend in all the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Given that all my stories seem to exist in the same 'verse, this is the same Legolas from [A Little Piece of the Sea](https://archiveofourown.org/series/39969), and the same Éowyn from [Silent Affinity](https://archiveofourown.org/series/39970).


End file.
